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Monday, November 22, 2010

Just letting you know

that I'll be going away until Sunday this week. It's been a really bad, bad, baaaad weekend.

Friday we had an appointment with the vet. Rosie's been having really really bad ears lately, so we wanted to get it checked again. She's been on medication for a long time and they just didn't seem to wanna heal. The vet put her in full narcosis, but she still cried out when the vet tried to examine her ear. In the end judgment fell.. It wouldn't be fair to Rosie to keep her alive. Her entire eardrum and mucosa were completely gone and she'd never be without the pain. She'd have to get her ear drained, cleansed and medicated throughout her entire life - and even painkillers wouldn't be sufficient enough to spare her the pain... We had to let her go. Therefore I dedicate this post to Rosie.


Full name: Cayuga Justonekiss
Called: Rosie
Born: April 9th. 2004
Sent to Dog-Heaven: November 19th 2010.


I can barely think of all this without wanting to cry. She was the 'Leader' of the flock. She was a diva and she went to dog shows most certain that the entire show was ONLY for her. Other dogs were simply lucky to have been invited. When she entered the ring, she would turn into this completely different dog. People could see that - and as her handler, I could feel it. She lit up, almost soared around the ring and took pride in being her. When she got her ribbon, she'd pick it up and carry it around in the ring, just to show off her pure awesomeness. She most definitely knew when she had won.

There will never be a dog like her. She only got 1 litter (that pretty much failed, as all of the pups had one illness, flaw or another) and 1 certificate (a specific prize. If you get 3 from different judges within the same country, your dog will be entitled 'Champion' of that country). She deserved many more. It's easy to look back now and think that she should never have had any puppies. She should simply have been allowed to go to dog shows and strut her stuff as she loved to do it.

We will miss her - and we will never forget her.
Never will there be anyone to ever take her place.

I promised myself that I would be strong, but as she was put in narcosis, she fell asleep on my foot as I sat beside her, I could see her looking at me as if she was saying 'What's going on? Why are you doing this?'. When we made the decision to put her down, my heart utterly BROKE. Many will say that dogs are simply dogs - but that's not true. Dogs like Rosie make everything worth while. She'd be the fluffiest, comforting shoulder to lean on, when you felt that everything was falling apart. Her and I would 'dance' and play on the fields, and every time we passed a bunch of kids playing soccer, she'd try to break loose to catch the ball. Even at 6 years she was playful, joyful and so lovable.

We got a bouquet from one of my mom's friends. She sent us a huge bouquet of white flowers with one single rose in the middle. The card said that that particular rose was to symbolize Rosie. And then she'd added a little quote that said "Wherever a beautiful soul has been, there is a trail of beautiful memories". So of course my mom and I had to cry again.. My dad made a photo album with pictures of Rosie. The worst thing is that he uploaded that picture above, of Rosie as a little pup in my lap by a camping area. We'd almost just gotten her home from Italy and decided to take her with us camping. She LOVED it and she was so happy and seemed as if she'd gone to Heaven. I remember her sitting in my lap almost attacking me with kisses and playful nibbles.

The other photo is of her from this year's Gold Cup show in Nyborg. This is where she had her uterus removed cause of an infection. She suffered from many illnesses throughout her time, so I guess we should've seen it coming. But generally it's hard to admit that your dog is ill, that you can do absolutely nothing to help her.. that it would be pure animal abuse to keep her alive spite the pain she's going through. And so.. we let her go.

We love you, Rosie. And you'll always be missed. We cherish the times we had with you, both good and bad, and I, personally, wish so bad, that you'd just come home again. That I can go downstairs at 7AM and you'll be laying in the hallway, one eye open looking at me like 'What? I aint going outside now! Are you crazy!?'.

So yeah.. my emotional blabbering is over.
'Normal' beauty post when I get home Sunday or at least the following week.

Obviously I haven't been feeling well this weekend. Crying on and off, holding her collar, looking into the hallway wishing that she'd lift her head and still be there.

But I know that's not gonna happen. Letting dogs go is one of the things that you never get used to. I grew up in a kennel where dogs came and left.. either due to aging, illnesses or simply circumstances. But man.. I can't remember when it was last THIS hard to say goodbye.

Also I take this opportunity to thank everyone who sent us their condolences and deepest compassion. Rosie held a place within many peoples' hearts and thanks to you all, she had a great life - even though it wasn't long.

Good luck in Dog Heaven, love.
I'll see you soon
♥ ♥ ♥

22 comments:

  1. This pulled on a heart string :( I'm sorry for you're loss, she sounded like a brilliant dog and friend, chin up! :) xxx

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  2. sorry for your loss :( i've never had a pet in my life so i can't say i understand what it feels like but i certainly know that the pain is real. *hugs*

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  3. I am so sorry to hear this. It's never easy losing a pet. Take care <3

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  4. i am so sorry to hear this. it's never easy to lose a pet(friend). it just made me think about my own bad. i hope you will get well soon...

    i actually wanted to answer your questions but i think i will do it next time. going to comment on a new post. it just doesn't feel right to answer it on this post i think.

    xxxHanna

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  5. i am sorry for your sad loss :( she must be a great pet and a great friend of yours! take care xoxo

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  6. Sounds like Rosie was an amzing dog ♥ I bet she's happy now because she received so much love from you, your family, your friends and her friends.♥

    Actually I started to cry while reading this entry, I lost my dog last year and I'm still crying from time to time. People who never owned a dog probably can't understand this pain. I started to wear my dog's tag around my neck right after the day she went to heaven, I never ever put it off since then.

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  7. I'm so sorry for your loss! *hugs*

    Rosie sounds so fun and playful!! I'm sure she wouldn't want you to be sad =]

    The cosmetic counters/stands/aisles in Denmark don't sound too appealing after reading your comment =[ Can you please snap a few pics and show it to us anyways? =D

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  8. I'm very sorry to hear about your dog ;-/ This makes me very sad because I also have a dog who is fairly old. But you are lucky to have so many people around you that care & console you !

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  9. My deepest condolence :(
    This seriously brought tears to my eyes! I'm an animal lover and I too have a dog and to think to hear from the vet saying that needing to put her down will be the hardest thing to hear! Like you said, its not just ANY dog, she will always be family to you...
    Hope you get well soon and cherish all the memories you had with you!

    I'm sure Rosie would not have been happier with any other family but yours.

    RIP sweet Rosie <3

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  10. omg so sorry to hear. I think beauty posts can wait!! RIP Rosie, and *hugs* to you :(

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  11. I'm so sorry, nothing can replace Rosie but I'm sure she wants u to b happy~

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  12. Im sorry to hear about this, but glad i did.

    Its nice to share her life with other people, and to know it wasn't wasted. xx

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  13. I'm so sorry for your loss...pets are always a hard thing to get over. I had to let the vet put my hamster to sleep a few years ago because he developed a cancerous tumor. Even though it was just a little hamster, he was my first pet, and it was really upsetting for me too. After going through that experience, I don't want to ever have pets again. Even though Rosie isn't physically with you anymore, at least you still have all your wonderful memories together to remember her by :)

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  14. P.S. I tagged you for 2 awards, but you can get to it when you're ready - no rush at all.

    Link to post

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  15. I'm sorry for hearing this, dear. I know how it feels... I ever had a dog named Chibi when I was a child. As a little girl, I love it when we played together, when I talked to him while my brother made a mess with me, and I really hate to realize he's gone =(
    But however, smile because Rossie ever exists in your life, cheer up! ^^

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  16. Oh gosh that's horrible!I have a dog, and I can just imagine what you must feel like...Your dog was so cute!like a bear!Hang in there=/

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  17. wow lovely dog!!!!
    amazing post!
    HI! my name's martina and I come from Italy...I would like you visit my blog and if you want...follow me! I wait you and your tips!!!kiss kiss! ^^

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  18. RIP Rosie. I am so sorry about it. I how you feel..Don't be sad. kisses and hug.

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  19. I remember when we had to put my dog down, so I can understand how you feel. I hope you're okay. x

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  20. i am sorry to here this.. take real good care and i understand the pain u r goin thru~


    Love,
    winwin
    http://princessdiary-winwin.blogspot.com
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    ReplyDelete

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